I feel so empty

Well folks (does anyone actually read this?), it has been a while. A lot has happened since I last wrote.

Three weeks ago today, I found out I was pregnant. We were so excited, but with caution, because it was so early. I was feeling fine, great, happy, but in the back of my mind I knew something would go wrong. My husband had an upcoming hunting trip out of state, and I knew that if something would go wrong - it would happen then.

I was right. It was awful. I am so sad.

Labor Day Weekend!

It was so glorious to have a 4-day weekend! I have been working too damn much lately. M and I headed up to the cabin on Thursday night after work, and came home yesterday (Monday) around noon. The weather was beautiful the whole time. We spent time sailing, swimming, fishing, and shooting shotguns. I was excited to try out M's new Benelli - I am not an experienced gun shooter, so I just shot at stationary targets, not any clay pigeons just yet. :)

We celebrated our first anniversary on Sunday (Sept. 6th). We had a great sail that day, followed by a pontoon cruise, fishing, and dinner out at the "fancy" restaurant up there.

Ecco did manage to get into trouble a few times. She found a dead rotting fish in the woods, and rolled in it. Also, she got stung by a bee on her back foot. Other than that, the weekend was a success.

Pleeeeease, pretty please?!

My mom called and told me there is a Great Dane female (2 yrs old), needing to be adopted. Her name is Geneva, she is fawn colored, has cropped ears, and weighs 140 pounds! She belongs to a friend of a friend of my mom's, who is ill and can't take care of the dog anymore. I have always wanted a Great Dane. They are such gorgeous, gigantic dogs.
The Mr. says no, we cannot adopt Geneva. Great Danes have a very short life expectancy (6-7 years). He does not want to get attached to a dog only to have it die a few years later. Besides, if we get a second dog, it will be a pointing Lab.
I know I'm probably not going to be able to talk him into this one. I'm still trying to convince my parents into adopting her. Wish me luck.

A horrible day!

Oh my God, I'm in the worst mood of my life! I got AF today, so I have PMS. I have been feeling totally depressed with my self-image lately. I am super-fat and terribly ugly. Worthless. Grr. I'm going to kick my ASS into losing at least 30 lbs. HELP! I have never felt so awful about myself.

I chopped my hair

Got 7-8 inches cut off! Yay!

Grrrr!

Awww man! My temperature dropped today, which means AF will be here soon. So much for my urge to POAS yesterday. I guess I won't need to make a trip to the DollarTree afterall. The plus side, is I can enjoy some tasty beers and beverages over the 4th of July.

Speaking of the 4th...
I'm so excited. We are headed to the cabin from Tuesday June 30 to Monday July 6th. I can't freaking wait to have that time off work.

I'm a slacker

Wow, I'm really horrible at updating this. Oops! Well probably a lot has happened since I last wrote. Let's begin with the most recent. Today is my grandma's 90th birthday! She's an amazing woman - very healthy and hardworking. Hell, she still has a job. We are celebrating her birthday on Saturday. I had 2 of my wedding photos enlarged and framed for her. One is of me, my husband, and her. The other is of our whole extended family. They turned out great, and I think she'll love them.

I found out yesterday that my friend J's cancer is 90% gone. She has only had 2 chemos, and has 4 more to go. Her doctor has never seen such a dramatic result so quickly. She has such an amazing, positive attitude about life, and I'm sure that is helping with her recovery.

Tonight we had my parents over for dinner, and it was so great! They are the first guests we've had for a meal since our kitchen remodel. M cooked up the fresh sunfish that we caught at the cabin last weekend. My parents we very impressed.

I will close this post with the status of my Uterus. I have ovulated, folks! This is the first time in about 8 years. I am currently 10 DPO, so I'll keep y'all updated...

I have been drinking some beers, so forgive me if I ramble. My mind is a jumble of thoughts.

Yesterday, I went to visit my friend in the hospital. You may remember, I mentioned my aerobics teacher/friend has lymphoma. They diagnosed her with Non-hodgkins lymphoma, stage 3. I think it's amazing that she was going around with stage 3 cancer and feeling perfectly normal. Geez. She's taking her first round of chemo in the hospital, so they can monitor how she reacts to it. It was so good to see her. She was in good spirits, and feeling well. It makes me feel so sad and almost helpless that something like this can happen to such a wonderful person.

Today is Thursday... which is only like my Wednesday, because I have to work on Saturday. I hate working Saturdays so much. It is only 8-12, but we have to do it once a month. To top it all off, this particular Saturday will be me working with not one, but TWO temps! Arghhh! Temps in my field tend to be SO strange. They always fall behind, and ask the stupidest questions. Dang you, Coworker, for going on maternity leave! Just kidding, I love ya! Not like you are reading this, anyways. Who DOES read this? Probably nobody. Hello!? Anybody there?! Wanna come have a beer with me; this Bud Light is tasting mighty fine :) Back to the work thang - at least I will be getting some overtime hours - which is a mighty fine thing.

Welllllll ok. My doggie is going nuts right now. The neighbors' dogs are outside playing. They make so much damn noise. Especially the basset hound. Now my dog is screaming her head off. No, Ecco, you cannot go out and play. I am such a mean dog-mom. OH! Now she just came onto the ottoman and she's laying on my legs as if she were a blanket. Sweet pup.

Until next time...

More wedding pics!

Wedding photos are here!

I will post some that I like... There are so many to choose from! I usually dislike how I look in photos - however - I love these :)

Some good, some bad and sad.

Today I went to the "Star of the North" meeting. It is Minnesota's state dental convention. Woo-hoo - I know. Six coworkers and I went to a 3-hour lecture called DNA and Dentistry. We learned a little about forensics. It was pretty interesting, but I'm kind of a nerd, so that is my thing. Afterwards, our doctors met up with us and took us out to lunch at a very nice restaurant. I am still full from all the great food I ate!

So I got some exciting news first: A coworker had her baby girl very early this morning! Everything went well, baby and mom are healthy. Yay!

Then I got some bad and sad news. My mom texted me during my class a message that our friend (and our aerobics instructor) has lymphoma. This hit me like a ton of bricks. That sounds so cliche, but how else can I describe the feeling? She noticed a lump in her neck about a month ago. She went to a few different doctors for it to check things out. She was put on antibiotics to see if that cleared things up. It didn't. So they did the most recent test/biopsy on Wednesday. We were all pretty optimistic that it was nothing. This is such shocking and sad news. She is feeling good, though. Ugh. I am just so upset.

Onto the next cycle!

Woot, woot! The provera worked, and I'm finally onto my next cycle. I didn't miss the cramps, though. I got my results from the blood test and all is normal. Yay!

M and I went running again last night. I am really feeling jiggly... I wish I had the motivation to exercise more and eat less. Sigh.

So tonight, we're celebrating a friend's 30th birthday. I volunteered to sober-cab, because I have to get up early tomorrow for our state dental convention. I hate how everyone questions my reasons for not drinking. Ugh. "Is she 'sober-cabbing,' or 'mommy-cabbing?'" I guess I'll just have to deal with questions and comments like that.

We are FINALLY getting our final wedding pictures on Monday. It has been almost 8 months. We saw the previews on Easter, and they looked pretty damn amazing. I normally hate how I look in photos, but I think I look good in (most of) the wedding pics. Yay!

It's a beautiful day

It got up to around 70 degrees today. We have needed this weather so badly - the winter has been so long. So on my way home from work, I was hoping that M would be home and wanting to go for a walk with me and Ecco. I get home, and he is getting ready to go for a run. Ugh. Running is something I am NOT good at... But being such a nice day out, and me feeling fat, I decided to go. It wasn't that bad! We ran/walked for about 2 miles! I am so proud of myself. To top it all off, I made a healthy chicken and veggie stir-fry for dinner. MMM...

In other news. I went to the doctor last Friday for my "absent menses." He gave me a Provera Rx, and I had a blood test. He wasn't very worried about anything - he said I didn't even need to take the Provera if I didn't want to. I haven't heard back about my blood test yet, but I'm not to concerned about that. I did start the Provera on Saturday. It is a 10 day Rx, so I will hopefully get my period mid to late next week. Hopefully that will get my body back on track - we'll see!

Tomorrow it begins!

M and I are starting the "50 million pound challenge" tomorrow. I said my goal is to lose 20 pounds, but now I'm wondering if that is realistic. Maybe 15. Or 10. Ugh. I need to go grocery shopping today to get the food that we're supposed to eat. The website is pretty cool - they give you weekly meal plans complete with shopping lists. I wonder if I can do this. I have been hating my body lately. I feel so flubbery and fat. It doesn't help that my aerobics class doesn't meet this week due to spring break. Grrrr.

The first two pictures there are the "after," the bottom three are "before." I need to figure out how to rearrange them better. While we're at it, I'll add a pic of my darling dog, Ecco, checking her email.

This is my first post!

As I sit here on my couch, writing this first blog entry, I can't help but feel a bit lazy and kind of pathetic. I should probably be doing other household chores, considering our house is a pig-sty. I also wonder who in the hell is going to be reading this? Probably nobody, but I don't care that much. Sometimes it just feels good to write/type things out.
I am happy to announce that our kitchen remodel project is damn near complete! M and I had the messy task of grouting the tile backsplash yesterday. I'm not gonna lie - it looks damn good. The only thing left to do is put the crown molding around the cabinets, and install new baseboard. I am thrilled. We are planning on having a big party once everything is finished. We have lived here almost four years and still haven't had a housewarming party. Once I get more into this blog thing, maybe I'll figure out how to post some before and after pics of the kitchen project.